Lekria
by TheCrimznFuckr
Summary: This fanfic uncovers the stupendous events that happen with the one and only Lekria Nyitis. These events will take place in the universe of Adventures of Kalisto by Sebbyninja666.


"Eh…" Lekria moaned as light seeped through the seam in his eyelids. "It is way… too fucking early…" the umber blooded troll sighed as his alarm bellowed a swishing sound. He reached his sopor caked arm through the hole of his recuperacoon and shut his alarm clock off. Lekria couldn't figure why he kept the thing; he has never abided by it since the day his dancestor Miroan gave it to him. The alarm clock could never get Lekria out of his recuperacoon as fast as his stern lusus, Scruffy.

Scruffy was a distinguished and crafty creature. Its large, bus sized body was covered in long, white, tough fur and had no limbs besides two small paws sticking out of each side of his body. Its face was large and round and much resembled that of a bark fiend who had a large nose and a short snout. It had jowls that covered its entire mouth, yet it managed to always have its massive tongue peek out a little. The rest of his face was covered by hair that came from his forehead, but his eyes were visible as brown semi-circles. Despite its massive size and lack of mobility, Scruffy was still able to do what was needed to care for Lekria. If Lekria needed food, a fresh loaf of rye bread and butter would be next to Scruffy before it could be noticed. Scruffy was also apparently able to teleport places prior to others noticing him. How Scruffy preforms these miracles is an enraging mystery to those who first encounter them, but it's something that one gets used to after a little while.

Scruffy was however a very stern creature that had to be fed a large stockpile of food every morning to keep him from being angry. There would be hell to pay if Lekria stalled getting his lusus his breakfast.

Lekria had never fed his lusus meat because once he had the taste of blood, he would want it forever. Lekria would feel bad if he had to kill beast after beast around the clock just to keep his lusus calm, so he maintained a mystifying greenhouse in his basement, jam-packed with fresh vegetation that was exclusive to Lekria's region of alternia. Besides, there were hardly any breathing creatures where Lekria lived besides the occasional rabbit, so that would make the chore of feeding Scruffy meat even more of a challenge.

The massive father was getting irritated on account of his empty stomach and let out a quick yet loud snort. Not wanting to experience what would happen next, Lekria's eyes widened in fear as he slithered out of his recuperacoon with haste. "Alright, alright, j-just hold on a second, please!" Lekria made a clumsy dash to the shower where he washed all of the sopor off of his body with freezing water. Within seconds, he bolted out of the bathroom fully dressed and went down to the basement to fetch a toy chest sized basket of vegetables he had picked the night before. When he brought it back up, Scruffy calmed down at the sight of his feast. Scruffy proceeded to happily bury his mouth in the pile of produce in front of him while Lekria sighed hugged the side of his lusus' large furry body for a moment.

Having dodged the angry lusus bullet, Lekria made his way back upstairs back to his respite block. On his nightstand lay one of his many Morningstar flails that he found very fun to practice with. He picked it up and practiced a strike on his wooden dummy for a couple of minutes. His laptop caught his attention as someone by the name of CarcinoGeneticist. He had never spoken to this troll before, so he took some time to humor him.

CarcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling OminousMoonset [OM] at 10:28 am

CG: HELLO DIMWIT.

OM: dO I knOW yoU?

CG: OF COURSE YOU DON'T KNOW ME. YOU DO HOWEVER, KNOW SOMEONE BY THE NAME OF TAVROS NITRAM AND GAMZEE MAKARA. IS THIS TRUE?

This was weird. Tavros talked about his friends, but never mentioned a short tempered person who hides his blood color.

OM: yeS

OM: maY I asK whY youRE askING?

CG: BLUH. IT'S JUST THAT TAVROS ESPECIALLY HAS BEEN GOING ON AND ON ABOUT THIS GUY HE AND GAMZEE ALWAYS HANG OUT WITH. IT GOT ANNOYING AFTER A WHILE AND I JUST WANTED TO SEE IF THIS FLUFFER ACTUALLY EXISTED SO I COULD PROMPTLY TELL HIM TO TELL TAVROS TO SHUT THE FUCK UP, BECAUSE MY EFFORTS OF DOING SO HAVE BEEN IN VAIN.

CG: THAT SAID WOULD YOU MIND TERRIBLY TELLING YOUR FELLOW BROWN BLOODED IMBICILE TO STOP BRAGGING ABOUT THE ONE TRUE FRIEND HE HAS BESIDES A MENTALLY DISTURBED JUGALLO STONER?

OM: noT thAT I doNT agrEE wiTH yoU oN thE faCT thAT tavROS caN sometIMES bE someWHAT a litTLE toO boastFULL AND thE faCT thAT gamZEE is… someTHING elSE…

OM: anD thE faCT thAT hE probABLY doeSNT haVE thAT maNY frieNDS

OM: buT caN yoU reaLLY blaME hiM foR wantING toO teLL oF alL thE fuN timES heS haD? hE doES deseRVE tO, doeSNT hE?

OM: yoU knOW hE doES

CG: OKAY, WELL MAYBE I DIDN'T THINK OF IT THAT WAY. BUT STILL, IT IS ANNOYING. HE CAN HAVE HIS BULGE ABOUT IT, BUT PLEASE TELL HIM TO KEEP HIS BULGE AWAY FROM ME. ITS SICKENING TO HEAR HIM TALK ABOUT IT CONSTANTLY. AND IF THAT WERE'NT ENOUGH, NOW I GOT GAMZEE CONSTANTLY HONKING ABOUT IT. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT'S LIKE DON'T YOU?

OM: thE honKS? yeAH, sometIMES i caNT staND thAT shIT.

OM: althOUGH, whAT couLD possIBLY bE sO specIAL aboUT mE foR hiM tO brAG tO yoU?

OM: anyWAY, I underSTAND. okAY, wiLL dO

CG: OKAY, GLAD WE GOT THAT CLEARED UP.

OM: cG, waIT. twO quesTIONS befORE yoU leaVE. iS thAT okAY?

CG: WHAT IS IT?

OM: whAT iS yoUR name?

CG: KARKAT VANTAS

OM: glAD tO haVE meT yoU maN. iM lekRIA nyiTIS

Discussing opinions, preferences, lusii, different specibuses and moduses, friends, the two typed and typed for a full hour until Lekria asked his second question as karkat reminded him he had one.

OM: okAY, noW thE othER quesTION iS…

OM: hoW wouLD yoU feEL aboUT meetING uP someTIME?

CG: WHY WOULD I EVER CONSIDER MEETING SOME STRANGER, MAINLY ONE WHOM IM ONLY TALKING TO TO TELL HIM TO TELL TAVROS TO KEEP HIS GAPER SHUT, SIMPLY BECAUSE HE TOLD ME TO ON A WHIM? YOU KNOW WHAT? BETTER YET, A BETTER QUESTION WOULD BE WHY THE PILE FUCKING FUCK WOULD YOU WANT TO HANG OUT WITH ME?

OM: weLL foR starTERS, iM someHOW remiNDED oF mysELF bY yoU. i thiNK wE wouLD geT aloNG. besiDES, iT wouLD bE a shaME iF wE nevER spoKE aftER thIS, woulDNT iT?

CG: OKAY, I CAN SEE WHERE YOUR GETTING AT HERE. AND ILL HAVE TO ADMIT, YOU ARENT NEARLY AS STUPID AS I THOUGHT YOU WOULD BE.

OM: i couLD saY thE saME thiNG tO yoU.

CG: ILL CONSIDER IT. BUT AS IT STANDS, I GOT ALOT GOING ON RIGHT NOW. SPEAKING OF WHICH, I SERIOUSLY HAVE TO GO NOW.

CarcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling OminousMoonset [OM] at 11:46 a.m

Lekria had figured he had been messing on his computer enough. He could get to work writing or drawing something, but he didnt feel inspired enough to do it. Perhaps now was a good time to catch up on some troll manga? Lekria opted to partake in training his fiduspawn creatures first. This would aid in giving Tavros the slip should he and Lekria cross paths.

**AN: Lekria is my fantroll. Veloid... no one cares about Veloid anymore... Besides, Lekria is actually a canceleo (born from Jul 19-25. I was born on the 24th and am technically a leo, but i wanted a better fantroll than veloid because Veloid was a bad fantroll and I had no idea what to do with him) troll, so that means hes my patron troll. I know this chapter isn't anything too special, but gotta start somewhere, right? WARNING: I will be breaking alot of fantroll rules throughout this fanfic, so please don't freak out when I do. **


End file.
